Which President would win a Knife Fight?

Review the following blog post about the question which President would win a knife fight to the death.

What do you think? Post a comment with your thoughts (if it does not appear right away, it is because I have to approve comments, so it might take 24 hours to show up.)

All posters will get extra credit toward the course, a few points added to your tests scores, for example. The best reason to do it, however, is because it is a fun endeavor that brings our presidents to life.


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About Mark Tebeau

I blog and tweet as urbanhumanist. My research explores history, landscape, and place. Of course, politics, life, and occasionally family are fair game as well. And, broadly, this online journal reflects the random and digressive thinking of a scholar seeking digital bliss. Ostensibly, urbanhumanist integrates the perspectives of public history, digital humanities, and interpretive scholarship, but more likely, it’s disjointed, self-indulgent drivel. Email at mtebeau at gmail dot com or tweet at urbanhumanist. In my courses, I use the regional urban environment as a research laboratory in my courses. In conjunction with undergraduates, regional teachers, and colleagues, I developed a website devoted to the history Cleveland Cultural Gardens. Along with my colleagues at the Center for Public History and Digital Humanities, I have created Cleveland Historical, a nifty mobile smartphone app. Our goal here is to promote collaboration, openness, and dialogues across the urban trenches of Cleveland.

5 thoughts on “Which President would win a Knife Fight?

  1. Jessica Harris

    I believe that Howard Taft would win. He was bigger than the rest and he could get stabbed a couple times and it would hurt but it would be in the fat that he has. Even though he might not be able to stab anyone because of his fat.

  2. Glenn D

    Who would win discussions would not be complete without including Ulysses S. Grant in the finalists. As a miliatry tactition he would be looked to as a natural leader in the forming of alliances in the early going of the fight. Likely allies would include Jackson and Lincoln and Teddy R. He would court Ike, George Washington, and FDR and Marty Van B. but would give them up in the battle. While he had a reputation as an accomplished drinker, I think it would serve him well in an all out fight. But in the end I say Jackson wins as he would be best when it got down and dirty and there was no one else to send into battle.

  3. Kyle Novak

    My choice would have to be Abraham Lincoln, only because of how tall he was. In a knife fight, other then actually being good with a knife, you need to have a long reach and thats what Honest Abe had. The man needed a personal bed made for him because of how tall he was. That would definitly increase his percentage in survival. Also there was that thing about hunting vampires for a while.

  4. Josh Hartman

    Clinton would probably talk someone into giving him their knife as well so he would be equipped with 2 knives, but this wouldn’t be enough to save him. George W. Bush would be in such a state of confusion that he would end up falling on his own knife. Harry Truman wouldn’t last very long as he is known to push buttons. Martin Van Buren had the nick name the Little Magician so who knows what kind of tricks he has up his sleeves. Anyway it would be a very close fight towards the end with Lincoln and Teddy still clinging to their blades but I think that the winner would be none other than Ol’ Hickory himself Andrew Jackson. Teddy Roosevelt would be his biggest competition along with the long arms of Abe Lincoln. Jackson would give Teddy Roosevelt the opportunity to take the first stab and Jackson would take this stab with a laugh and retaliate with the winning blow. Jackson fears no man and would win the mass presidential knife fight.

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